Craft Business

My Journey to change

 My Journey to change

End of 2014

2014 became the end of fear and a new beginning towards change – again all sounds so dramatic and so forth, but to be fair it was not really – but it was the wake up moment – the Aha moment that I heard and listened to this time.

A friend contacted me and offered me some work within a local school – and I found my feet and some self respect and focus – my confidence and self esteem in such a short period of time improved and by christmas 2014 I realised that I did not want to go back to any of the feelings, negativity and behaviours that I had been through and been experiencing in 2014.

I have not mentioned even the business with you – both were ok but unfocused and lacked clarity – WHY? because I did. I was and had been operating in panic mode – consistently throughout the year – fear of change, and in total denial that anything needed to change 🙁 not a happy place to be in at all.

To the outside world all was grand, nothing wrong and all ok – yet my weight was ballooning, I was struggling with debt and money and trying to cope being a menopausal hormonal woman as well – it was like my body was attacking me constantly and had become my enemy…….. the warrior and superwoman models of behaviour back in play then!!!

we-cant-be-afraid-of-change-c-joybell-c-in-trust-your-journey-on-fb

And so began 2015 – Change! New Beginnings

In this blog I will only deal with the start of 2015 as I actually feel this is like a living blog series of posts and I do  not want to swamp anyone in what all went on or even get so deep that it becomes a bit boring either.

Some parts of the year will be faster than others and some can be skipped lol ……. I am not going to bore you with – woke up, had breakfast – what I ate was etc – omg nothing like that – but it will be about a very simple journey of awakening that happened for me and how it is and has impacted on me personally and in turn then within my business, plus how I coped.

Menopause – added ingredient to the mix

My journey to change can not ignore this lovely little added ingredient into the mix.

I just can not go any further without raising this in regards to me and my coping strategies around it all and of course its impact on me – personally and my business.  Omg it has floored me at times.  I started it all around 44 years of age possibly even sooner – and it was not just the hot flushes for me it was major hormonal upheaval and irratic behaviour – so after fighting it for quite a while – I pushed to be on HRT and stayed on them for around 2 years – but as you know everything has risks – I have a range of health issues and one of which is `sticky blood` so being on HRT really became an non option avenue – so came off them.  Which is good but needed a replacement – so researched and found Starflower and Menopal Plus from Simply Supplements and a slight change to diet – but thats also in the year of change blog lol.coming or going - menopause

But being a woman in the change – trying to make changes and deal and cope with changes – no one said it would be easy but dear god……………. please it just becomes another layer of complicated.  Plus no one told me your brain goes to mush, your memory gets fucked or that you feel so irratated with everyone so often.   But it was the memory lose and sometimes confusion that upset me and put fear of dementia into my head – that was what I struggled with more than hot flushes and sweats – have a room full of 45 + year olds in any room and you just have to make sure no heating on and plenty of water available and of course near the toilets – forgot bladder weakness comes next as well – holy shit I felt I needed traded in ………………..cartoon on computer

January 2015 – now Change

Ok so I did not wake up suddenly 1st January 2015 and go – thats it – change. I did wake up and go – ok what do I need to change and how the fuck am I going to do this……… oh shit – and then the internal dialogue of – ok Sharon, get a grip first things first what needs sorted first.  Money – what you have, what you don`t have, what you owe, what you paying out, getting in and getting comfortable with making sure you know it inside and out – where you are Right Now?

So thats what I did – not right on New Years Day but the very next day…. 2nd January – I got out everything – bills, credit cards, bank statements and started really taking back charge of what I needed to know about where we were right now – personally and also as a business.  And it was not that pretty to be honest – not major bad but enough for us and if we continued in same vein – it would not end well.

With the week I had registered online with bank – I know why had it taken me so long – no answer other than did it and got it set up and then I looked again – and I got hubby to look and we sat down and just went – RIGHT (BIG SHOUTY WORDING) …… lets get a grip.  When we budgeted previously it worked for us – but we had gone of the rails (no idea what really did it as christmas was not an expensive spend but we had majorly gone off the boil).  We had to get back on track and right now.

And we did – at the same time as getting a grip of our money, cancelling direct debits no idea what for – ex rugby club hubby had stopped playing at 14 years ago ? I know only £2 a month but 14 years of £2 a month adds up – then magazines and others shite that really I did not need, we did not need – now down to bare minimum as bills going out only and essential bills only.

But I also joined an online FB challenge – Money : A Love Story Challenge by Kate Northrup

https://www.facebook.com/groups/MoneyALoveStory

This started my journey into 2015 making changes – I know some might find it a bit hocus pocus as its Fengi Shui orientated but for me it made sense – it started me doing and thinking and actioning – and thus the change began.  For the 21 days I engaged in the Fb group and got so much from it all – I would recommend anyone seeking out challenges like this – it asks you to take responsibility and then to take action – and that is just what I started to do.

Action – is it painless ?

No its not – its not easy – we, me – I had to face the reality that I needed to take back the control – take on the responsibility of our money, my money and begin to love it all again and not allow it to control me.  The fact that its taken me 10 months to even be blogging about this all – I think sort of says how deep rooted my fear of change and talking about it has been.

At 49 years of age – nearly 50 lol – to actually admit that this is all not perfect and running smoothly and that I have taken so long to get my head right (and still doing so) and all the other stuff as well – is really hard, in fact its taken me all of 10 months to be able to put it on here – I thought I was the worst mum, wife, partner, business woman, woman let along person – basically I was a failure – after all how fucking hard can it be – being organised, being in the right mindset, not getting distracted, not getting into negative behaviours and attitudes, get slim, get fit, be successful, make money  – aaarrrrrrrggggggghhhhhhhhh.

And that was the crucial piece – I felt a failure – I felt I was not as successful as I wanted to be and to be honest at times I was not sure I actually wanted to do what I needed to do to turn it around – therefore by definition I was lazy and therefore a failure and therefore did not deserve to be successful.  Vicious cycle and it just went round and round and round – and it was this i had to stop.

But the journey began – change begun and it has grown – its still not right, but good enough, right enough to make changes and progression.

 

2015 has been a battle with Money – loving it, growing it, managing it, saving it, spending it, cherishing it – but I am in control of it more and more.  It no longer controls me – as I get towards end of the year and look forward to 2016 – I believe I value it more and embrace it better than I have ever done before. I recommend her book and doing the challenges – if nothing else worth a go to get some sense of what you need to do to progress forward.  Seriously it so makes sense and something many many many will not be covering in Business coaching or other areas of support.

Money-A-Love-Story

 

 

 

 

 

 

http://Money, a Love Story: Untangle Your Financial Woes And Create The Life You Really Want

 

I am still in midst of the declutter !!! seriously its an ongoing area of work with me – but one I am more insightful on – I recognise the triggers for spend and I am now looking at it all as – do I really need it, will I use it, what could I use that money for if did not spend it on x – is this an investment or a drain, is it an asset or not – and if all of the answers are not positive then its not considered.

The other thing I began to get a grip of…….

Organisation – change

Being organised is key for me – and having become so dis-organised had lead to overwhelm and all of the above for so long – so doing the Money : A Love Story Challenge started the process off and made me realise just how out of whack I really was.  This floored me as I felt when I worked in the Public sector for my 20+ year career I was Mrs Organised, so OCD and quite anal to be truthful on where things went and keeping things organised – so this chaos and dis-organisation is where my overwhelm and lack of everything came from along with mindset of course too.

So the journey of change had begun and I was beginning to get a grip – and I was going to focus the whole of 2015 to do it – what I did not realise was that taking this year might only be the start……………… the focus I did not realise totally in January, February or even March of 2015 was that the change was about me and me alone.

Money a Love Story ; ” So what does self-care have to do with money? Everything. Remember, you’re trying to change your thoughts about you – to open your eyes to your worth. …………………. Self care is about loving yourself.  If you can`t learn to put energy toward your own care and feeding, who else will?  ……………………………………………..Money is about what we value.  We pay for what we value.  We pay attention to what we value.  This is an issue of valuing yourself.”

 

And that was it – this year has been about money, organisation, family, business, mindset, getting fit, getting healthy all on one level  –  but its really been  about love and value – me learning to love and value me again and its not all been plain sailing.

what you think important

 

And so the journey of 2015 continues for this 49 year old menopausal woman in business 🙂 ………

I hope you continue to follow me on my blogs right up to the present day across my year.  You will always be welcomed.

Thank you x Sharon 🙂

 

 

 

 

 

 

Stress – How it can Kill You if You Let it.

Stress – How it can Kill You if You let it.

Part 1 of my journey of change – the voice of my heart.

Past career – past stresses

I walked away from a job in 2011 after 20 years that was over the last 5 years of it killing me – all because of stress – I failed to recognise the signs and symptoms and also thought I was invincible and super woman.
In early October 2010 I just about made it home – I know I drove home stupid I know I know – and within 15 minutes went into a sudden cardiac attack – ie my heart went into melt down – and I was having a huge arrhythmia attack.

Most sudden cardiac deaths are caused by abnormal heart rhythms called arrhythmias. The most common life-threatening arrhythmia is ventricular fibrillation, which is an erratic, disorganized firing of impulses from the ventricles (the heart’s lower chambers). When this occurs, the heart is unable to pump blood and death will occur within minutes, if left untreated.

All this from stress – I was taken into hospital where I was given medication that stopped my heart and restarted it again to attempt to get the arrhythmia back on track and slow down – as the next stage was full cardiac arrest – (sounds very dramatic and scary – it was I have never consciously held onto a nurse and consultants hands so much in my life and just begged them to help me) – 3 days later I left hospital and told that I was in need of some serious help – but I what I got was some serious help from the best Heart Hospital and consultant in Europe at Broadgreen.

I went in on 29th April 2011 and my operation was 88% successful – apparently they had fun playing space invaders in my heart – Left ventricular de-fibrillation is what Mr Mark Hall did – thank god I was asleep – but next time I apparently need to stay awake eeek – hence why putting off for as long as I can.

I know for me its taken me a few years to actually really try to address and stop the stress impact and its consequences on me – I get stressed easily, I tended to over personalise things – if it went wrong it was because I was at fault, I was the problem, I am to blame – I continued to batter myself on leaving work, worry about money, worry about kids, worry about me – hit menopause lost the plot – flitted all over the place trying to find what I wanted to do – lost a heap of money, friends, because of some of the issues thought I was losing my sanity and my marriage and thought I had lost me. I thought life what shit to be honest.

The year from hell – ok I just lost my way!

2014 turned out to be the best and the worst year – you would have thought 2011 was – but nope – I am a slow burner – and I burnt and smouldered and hurt myself until November 2014 and I woke up from a bit of a fog – fuck me did I wake up (apologies for swearing if offended but I actually do swear).
I looked around me and made a choice to change – (thought I had as had read and listened to all the self help, spiritual stuff and people, books and videos ) but it all just kept nothing at bay and the shite kept coming – and then I looked at me, really looked at me and decided I needed to just stop.
So I did – and then good things started happening – not huge things or at fast paces but small little things – and things begun to change.

As you can see from the video – its all about learning to manage your stress and recognising what the causes are and how to combat them – don`t do what I did for so long – ignore, fight and under estimate what stress can do – both to you and those you love around you – I was a martyr and a warrior but realised the only one I was hurting was those I loved around me and me – the total opposite to what I wanted or thought I was doing .  Stupid yes absolutely.

Never under estimate your past – learn from it and move on

In 1995 and in 1996 I nearly died from Eclampsia – my daughters where both still born but I was lucky I was alive, on both occasions they fought to save my life and thank goodness they did – sadly the longer term impact both emotionally and mentally were much more long lasting than the physical impact.  But on both occasions I went into cardiac arrest – possibly this was the first real signs I had a heart problem – who knows but I had in 2010 been given a 3rd chance to get it right and for so so long I had – like so many other women – just got on with life.  Took it all in my stride, worked harder, did not give up (fought hard to have kids born alive and well and me well) and just kept up the warrior mode and of course being super woman – I did it all.

I fought for everyone – Trade Union secretary, spokesperson at conferences, extra work, degrees and qualifications, work work work, lived hard and played hard – and did not realise just how miserable I was making myself – the mask was on and the sword was in hand.

Then my world (created and designed by me) fell apart, I had taken the voluntary redundancy and my grieving for a career, job and identity began and continued – of course it did, this was me living in chronic stress mode again – cycle of learnt behaviour for me and a coping strategy I only knew.

Post attack but in denial

From 21012 – 2014 I was in denial and fear – adding more and more un-necessary stress to a world I did not need – and while it was better than when in a full time job and career prior to October 2010 it was really just a smaller version of what had been happening then.  I got into negative thought patterns, negative behaviour patterns and it was like the self destruct button was under my finger and regularly just being tested to see how far I would take me or my family to the edge of pressing.

By grief was so deep rooted and that I felt my whole identity was so wrapped up in my work and career, I thought it was me – so losing all that was like grieving for a part of me that had died and maybe I was taking myself there unconsciously.

Decision to change – I woke up from a fug

Then as I said I made a decision to change – I knew I was losing my sanity as it was insanity to keep doing the same thing over and over again and expect different results.  Was there an aha moment – sadly I had had a few, but choose to ignore them in 2012, 2013 but the one in 2014 was driving in the car from a part time job taken and just pulled over side of road and sobbed – I hated it.  What did I want ? What was I going to do ? How was I going to make those changes? I was at a loss – but for the first time I woke up from a fug – a fog so deep set that I had just been living and not really doing anything more – I knew then that I wanted more but most of all I deserved more, my kids and hubby deserved more and they deserved the happy fun me the real me – the me they loved – but the I needed to get back to loving me and me then being able to really love them all back – love the world back – be me.  So I drove home, sat hubby down – kids got into it all too lol – and they just told me to stop hurting myself and start doing what I loved.

Literally the next day – a friend from past asked me to do some work with her in local school and so it all began to change.  I began to really see what changes I could make, what choices I have and what chances I have been given.

3 cs in life

I started 2015 as I promised I would start it – making changes – positive changes.
I started with money , my love life/ marriage, my family, my business, my friends and through out them all myself. The most important one I often sadly forgot about or used to abuse.

 

 

 

 

Its Emotional – but good

Its been  an emotional year so far – not all has gone smoothly but slowly but surely things are improving – and I know I am at the end of the year ie now also changing other negative behaviours re food and relationship to food and weight – which has just been thrown in there as well lol.

But most of all I am finding what makes me smile, laugh and enjoy life again – hormones don`t help but hey thats the joys of aging and being female …… and I cry alot – just getting it all out, trying to stop being that warrior woman getting angry annoyed, frustrated and so forth – adverts get me going, doesn`t have to take much – but its a source of huge fun in the house – who can get mum sobbing over daft things lol.  But its ok –

I have been able to look more and more in the mirror over this year and put the pieces of me back together again – some good people have helped, some via business who are now good good close friends and others via knitting who are now getting more and more close as friends.  Others I have let go and thats ok – my circle of friends is rather small but my networking of colleagues is rather large.

Hubby and me – getting on better, marriage sorted – we still have a few pings in the ring now and again – I am an aries and he is libra – says it all – me quick to react him slow burner – but we are 25 years married and 27 years together so I think holding our own.

Kids – I am blessed – nothing more needs said.

Business & BizMums Networking

Business – well thats on the improvement side – the Knitting Fairy has come out and proud, freelancing working away and its all just moving from strength to strength – even got into the finals of BizMums Awards – Creative Business 2015 – so not all bad then

Finalist badge

 

 

So can stress kill you?  Yes it bloody well can so why are you allowing it to.

Chronic stress over long long periods of time is a silent killer and often many cardiac deaths are caused by it all – please please do not allow this time little word get so much play time in your life and have the huge impact that it will do to you and those you love around you.

Take action now – do not live with regrets – I know I am not any longer allowing chronic stress to have a heart hold on me or my families lives – I want to be around for a rather long time, to spend time with my kids, see them into adult hood, their own families and be a grandparent. I want to spend time with my grumpy ole fella who I adore and want a retirement where we can be there for one another into old age.

Business wise – I no longer want to the have any regrets and my vision of big is now what I am talking about and wanting to put our there.

So don`t let stress kill you – don`t let chronic stress get a grip.

 

 

 

Mindset – Fixed or Not

Mindset – Fixed or Not

positive thumbs upMindset is a huge area and one that is growing in popularity and discussion – from looking at the Psychological theories behind it all – Fixed or Growth Mindset by Carol Dweck – author of the book – “Mindset: The New Psychology of Success”, she explains that people tend to have 1 of 2 basic perspectives about their own abilities and capacities.  To looking at how Mindfulness and the area of positive thinking has and can influence your mindset and therefore direction of your focus.

There is a wealth of writings on the whole area of  mindsets – Fixed or Not – Fixed or Growth Mindsets – and they are all fascinating and illuminating for a coach to use and discuss when working with a client in a coaching session.

Mindset is important when looking at motivation, interest to grow and learn, resilience and ability to progress forward – for me its about working with you, the client, on what gets you going – whether than be in your personal life or business – as quite frankly its crosses over both.

Understanding your mindset and how you tick is vital – getting an understanding of critical reflective thinking about what you do, how you do it, what you can learn from it and what will do next from that learning that for me leads to people being successful, progressive and developmental irregardless of their personal life or business/ professional life.

Understanding your mindset also works with you on your confidence and self esteem – as a coach working with clients over the years it is in this area that I often see the greatest changes and from those changes in confidence and self esteem, those clients then making huge changes, taking great risks, becoming more successful, gaining in deeper and greater happiness and moving closer and closer to achieving their dreams, ambitions and life time goals.

I like to use this illustration – are you part of the 98% of the population – fixed and stuck in many cases – firmly and solidly fixed in your comfort zone and reluctant to venture out.

the-2precent-mindset-whoischick

Or are you part of the 2% of the population – choosing happiness, looking for opportunities and growth of experiences and abilities, learning from those around you, liking change and getting the most out of life.

This does not mean that if you feel you might “fit” into the 98% of the population mindset, that you can not change.

Mindset-Quote-8 C Dweck 2 mindsets of Fixed or Growth – (she claims that naturally about 40% of us are Growth Mindset and 40% Fixed Mindset and that the remaining 20% are a mixture of each) – but can we  change, can we develop and move our mindsets – of course we can.

 Thats what you do in coaching sessions – working with a coach to challenge the negative, comfort zone and fixed mindset – looking at designing and creating a more positive, confident and growth mindset – supporting you, the client, towards transformational change and long lasting transformational change.

But getting to grips with understanding mindset is key – its the key to changing, its the key to unlocking your potential and its the key to gaining long lasting transformational change – its just then about whether you really want it or not, whether you want to be in the 2% of the population or part of the 98% of the population.

Call me for a phone consultation – 07887653817 – to discuss your transformation and change of mindset

Email me – sharonjardine@sljassociates.co.uk –  to arrange a 1:1 if local face to face , phone and skype options available also.

change how you look - upside down bulldog

The Benefits of Coaching

The Benefits of Coaching

life-coaching

The Benefits of Coaching.

You need to know what the benefits of coaching are and will be when you work with me in our coaching sessions.  But also the benefits of coaching need to be seen as an investment in YOU and that you deserve to have this invest – and these are the reasons why.

  • Increase your self – confidence
  • Gives you more motivation
  • Makes you more self – awareness and understanding
  • Gives you more clarity in making decisions, choices and judging situations
  • Allows you to have a more fulfilling life/work balance
  • Allows you to work on expanding your horizons
  • Supports you in lessening your stress
  • Gives you better skills for better communication skills
  • Supports you gaining better relationships
  • Supports you gain better health and well-being routines eg diet, exercise.
  • You feel supported and not alone as you work to achieve your goals
  • It gives you time to reflect on what is important to you and who you really aspire to be.

 

 

When you work with a coach – working as a coach in the way that I do with SLJ Coaching & Training Associates – you can focus on what is really important to you and start to look to shape your life to be more in line with your values. Working with me will provide you an effective structure to support you moving forward in significant areas of your life, including career, your business, personal growth, relationships, family, friends, health, education, work, spirituality, fun and recreation, and your physical environment.

Benefits-of-Life-Coaching

When you work with me as a coach – I support and encourage you to be and take responsibility for the results you generate, ultimately you as everyone is responsible for your own life and the results they get.

 

When we work in this way and take responsibility for your own life, we have power and influence over it. We can then appreciate our own influence in situations and that we can choose between different possibilities.

 

When you work with me in this way it works, coaching works, because you are making the commitment to invest in yourself, with focused support to help you find clarity, self confidence and the motivation to continue and overcome barriers. Often we don`t really take the time to work out where we are going, what our lives are about, and what our values and goals are.http://www.dreamstime.com/-image23159248

If you do not know what you are doing, or want to go, you are unable to focus or have ineffective habits that you are not fully aware of and that will hold us back.

dreams and reality

Very often, we unconsciously or consciously resist change, because its easier and more comfortable to stay the way you are, even if it not what you truly want.

Working with me as a Coach helps you to overcome these barriers and make the changes you want, to step out of your comfort zone and test the waters of the stretch zone in a supportive and safe environment.

 

I empower and aspire you in my coaching for you to find your passion, your purpose and fulfil your full potential in your life and all the avenues of your life.

 

Sharon Jardine

Coach & Mentor

Increase of Women looking to Run Businesses from Home

442841-Royalty-Free-RF-Clip-Art-Illustration-Of-A-Cartoon-Woman-Working-On-Her-Computer-As-Her-Kids-PlayIncrease of Women looking to Run Businesses from home

Despite the economy that we are currently experiencing at the moment there is an Increase of Women looking to Run Businesses from Home – this is on the increase and many running many more than just one business as well.

As a Business Coach & Mentor as well as a Personal Dev Coach etc I hear so many women talking more and more about considering opening or running their own businesses, working for themselves or becoming self employed.

There has been a huge increase in the numbers of women running their businesses from home – looking towards a better work life balance and also with the rise in the cost of child care finding its a great incentive as well.

But also there are more women running a business from home in the evenings and at weekends – I for one have ran a 2nd and even a 3rd `job` as such for years when I worked full time in the Public Sector and today as a Business owner and Sole Trader I run a 2nd business – a Craft Business and a Micro Business but one that is doing well and thriving.

Its not always because of the drive to earn or have more income – although lets be honest this is often the main driving force of necessity for many – but its about bringing about a positive change to the family home of a work life balance and a greater connection for the family – we probably end up working harder and longer hours but in a way that suits us more.

I can compare how I work now to when my children were small and in full time employment – due to the nature of my work and the distance for travelling I felt I was on a treadmill, juggling all the balls in the air and beating myself up if I was not doing all the right things at all the right times.
Over the past few years I have found that being about to work with and around my family makes it all feel so much more worth while – I am fortunate and lucky to be able to do that and I know that – but it is a reason many many more women are looking to work from home and run their own businesses from home.

http://www.smallbusiness.co.uk/news/opportunities/2460587/two-thirds-of-mums-consider-starting-a-business-from-home.thtml

 

Be Your Own Life Coach

you are worth it

Be your own Life Coach

Making and taking tough decisions is not always easy but starting with being your own Life Coach is vital.

Being focused on yourself is the most important point and the very beginning of any one persons journey – let me support you being your own Life Coach in this vital starting point for yourself and learn what I know will make long lasting changes, transformational changes, to you,  both personally and professionally in your business or career for the future.

 

I will share with you over the coming weeks – case studies of where I have worked with real people such as you on making those changes and how working with me can do the same or similar for you.

 

But start with you – do some of the ground work yourself – get an interest in being your own Life Coach as well – start the changes now and realise that you matter and that you are that important.

 

 

Be your own Life Coach – I started doing exactly just that – hey who coaches coaches.

Fiona Harrold – be your own life coach.

http://Be Your Own Life Coach: How to Take Control of Your Life and Achieve Your Wildest Dreams

This little book started such a huge change in my life – I had already been making and taking tough decisions on making long term changes in my career, setting up in business and also some in my personal life.  But what this book did was open a window a fraction of space for me to see how much more work I needed to do ….. on ME – nothing else just ME.

I now follow Fiona`s work and coaching and I admire her approach as a Coach that I would like to emulate and role model.  I have had the privilege of being on a coaching programme she ran in 2013 and this further galvanised me to refocus and get to know with greater depth and clarity what I really wanted for me and my future.

This small book started a domino effect of getting for myself my own coach – both looking at my business and myself on a personal basis and realising the impact this investment could have on all areas of my life – not just where I thought it would be in.

Thats why I highly recommend not just this book, but also starting with yourself – be your own life coach – if you do not see the benefit of it all, then it does not matter how many, or who or what you get coaching in and around either your business or personal – you will just be given tools but have no motivation, no interest or see no value or worth in those tools.  Then they are just a waste of time, energy, finances and effort.  Basically you will only go so far and will very quickly slip back into bad habits and unsuccessful ways of being, working and running your life or your business.

 

Mine in the early days was all about believing in myself, getting rid of self doubt and having self worth.

Recently I have gone back and re read Fiona Harrolds book as I have been following her on Facebook and also doing some webinars and coaching sessions with her as well – following on from all of this I actually took up an investment of a coaching programme with her and the benefits catapulted me forward in both my personal and also my business life.

I realised I needed to invest in me and to do that I needed not just  a good coach but  a great coach – one who I could connect with and that is what I got on that coaching programme.  She has from this little book and me focusing on myself as being my own coach, me to realise that I could use all my skills, expertise and years of experience and be an excellent coach in turn to others who work alongside me.  That is now what I offer from me just being my own Life Coach.

 

Now while coaching other people is not what everyone else is going to do – having a good coach is what everyone needs and that is now what I offer and I know that my clients receive.  I will share with you over the coming blogs some of those case studies of clients and organisations I have worked with –  how  and where coaching has worked for them and why they see the worth and value to them of a Coach on both a personal and business level.

Coaching is about making and taking tough decisions – we often do not realise how much we sabotage ourselves  and our businesses or potential for successful futures.  So read this little gem and start the journey by being your own coach and enjoy.

 

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Twitter : @sharonjardine

Sharon Jardine – email  : sharonjardine@sljassociates.co.uk

 

New Year New You New Start – Financial Literacy

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New Year New You New Start – Financial Literacy

Financial Literacy – for me has become the greates learning curve both on a personal and a professional / business level.  When I was in paid work as an employee all I wanted to do was earn more, get higher up the career ladder , get recognition for all that hard work that I was doing and get rewarded with something to show for it all.

When redundancy came around I found out how quickly 20 + years was actually worth in £ cash – and it was not that good – and despite all the years of working so hard and not being finanically rewarded for those extra hours, stress and dedication – my redundancy pay came down to purely length of service and payments made only on ratio of how  Redundancy payment calculations are constructed – so this taught me a great and very powerful lesson I am determined never to repeat again – Know your worth and know what you are working for and why.

But this is not just about money as such – this New Year New You New Start part is around understanding Financial Literacy – in that I want to introduce you to the term and for you to ask the question – because believe me it will run across your personal and definitely into your business life – are you Financially Literate – do you understand money, your attitude to it and how you relate to money.  If you do great x if you do not – then this is the final area but a vastly important area to get to grips with in this new year new you new start for 2014.

How hard do you work ? – do you work for money or do you make your money work for you?

Ok – so why should I want to be more financially literate – doh why not?  I am not doing it for the money I hear you say – ok then here is a fact.

a. You will never be able to afford me as your coach – fact – I am a business and you pay me by the hour – I am not free.  

b. You will never run a successful business and probably work exceptionally hard to earn money that you never hold on to and end up ultimately working too hard for too little money and never have the work / life balance you ever wanted in your life, owe out money all over the place and end up stressing over money all the time and ultimately always chasing money as you will never have enough. Your business will never be financially in a position for you to be able to leave it ie take holiday or take a break and you will always be in debt moving from crisis to crisis and financial worry to financial worry.

Phew that was alot …………… but do you get a picture forming here.

I am not going to talk to you in this blog about making money – NO – I want you to look at your understanding of your Attitude you have to money, about money, how it relates to you, how you see money and how you relate to money – that is about understanding what Financial Literacy is all about – for me and its here that I learnt huge valuable lessons over the past few years.

So lets start by asking the questions…..

What is your attitude to Money ?  What were you told about money growing up?  How was money referred to in your home by your parents, family and so forth – even your community?

Do you have patterns of money in your family, with you now ?  ie are you in debt?  how often do you get into debt?  what is your attitude to debt?

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When I use the word RICH – what image jumps out to you – these are the areas that I start to work on with you when we do our coaching sessions – working through this area allows you to understand how you manage money, see money, feel money, images of money, and your attitude to money – as they all relate to success – and not always around wealth and financial success.

Money is only one area we work on – success is not money alone but it may well be one area that you work on to ensure you have greater opportunity to get to the successful outcome or goal that you want.  It has a part to play whether we like it or not it is part of the overall equation.

I will relate this to me and give you an example –

Took redundancy 2011 – at that time was in debt, mortgage, credit cards and loans – decided Redundancy would last about 2 years and I could take time out to get well after heart operation and might decide to get back into part time work later on.  All my life I have been told – work hard get educated and get more money – well did all that and we still had a good wage but not vast wealth that I would have liked.  I often said then – my job is my vocation money is not necessarily the main reason I work – well how right I was about that especially when it came to my company looking after me after all those years of extended loyality.  When it came to it,  all my worth was calculated in complete years that had worked for the company and nothing more – not the success that I had brought to that company, not the time putting in when did not get paid or get time back, nothing but years calculated to the least amount of money that they could pay me as possible – I was only ever referred to as a number – faceless and emotionless and purely fiancially driven. I totally understand it – but it taught me a valuable lesson in worth, value and my interpretation of where I put my value of me higher than the company put their value of me – plus despite being vocational / educational and working for development community etc it was still a business and businesses look at The Bottom Line – cost.

Less that 12 months later – still had credit cards, still had loans and needed to get into work asap – nothing financially had changed including how we spent as a couple with 2 people working on 2 good salaries.  Reality check arrived and it was big – then decided after a crap attempt working for `friends` and being screwed over and going for a job in a large major supermarket chain for minimum wage and at last minute turning it down – to take leap of faith and started up SLJ Training – realised very quickly not the right environment for Training etc – so went back and retrained and learnt all I could around Coaching and Business Development. Took previous skills as a Senior Manager in Council and turned all those skills into business directed skills for Coaching and Business Coaching – plus add on qualified counsellor, managed staff and teams and budgets for 20 + years into skills I could harness in SLJ Coaching & Training Associates.  But the biggest part of all the learning (and this was someone who has been in the education and educational / learning world for all my adult life ) was to learn about my attitude to money, what it meant to me, how I related to it and how it managed me in so many cases and not often in a positive way.

And rightly so you are saying – AND SO WHAT………..

What I did in the meantime was – read and learn, listen and talk to people who understood the business world and success – what I needed to do was also change – change  me and change my attitude to money, how I earnt it, what I did with it and what I needed it for.

My ultimate goal (I have a few but start with this one) is to own a Villa in Turkey to be able to retire there or have a retirement home outside of UK in the sun – I want to do this by around 55 but as Mike retires from his salary job 58 will go for then – that gives me 10 years (11 actually) to do it in. Plus Retire from `working` life (not sure I ever will but ultimate goal.

This does not happen on fresh air – but I also have 2 teenage kids to school, head off to college, university and clothe, feed and sort as well in the meantime – basically without an income this will not happen.

In changing my mind set around Money and getting better and better at it – I am now making changes – I am no longer spending and I am looking at my spending patterns and how and what we need , we have little or no personal debt, credit cards are paid off, mortgage for house has been dealt with, we save at a higher level than ever before – I am more savvy with money and what I do for money and what includes how to go about making money. This in little over 2 years and even more so over the past 12 – 18 months.

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My learning around money is improving and improved vastly  – I know more and more about what I want money to do for me rather than previously working my ass off for money and still having nothing at end of month – rather than me just working for money – NOW money works for me.

I now know that for my Business to get better – for me to improve their and in my personal life I need to have assets not liabilities, I need to make money work for me not me killing myself working for money and I also need to be astute in what I do with my money – ultimately I can do more and give more and have a greater impact in my goals for my business and for me in starting up my business.

Thats the start of Financial Literacy – there are loads more but this is just a glimpse into what you do with me – not just dealing with light nice things but really delving in deep (not into your accounts – thats for you and your accountant) but about what you value money to be for your success or your journey towards success.  What it means to you?

So if you are ready for the New Year New You New Start and learning about Financial Literacy – then contact me further and lets journey together  – the more you understand yourself, your attitudes and what you want from life via personal goals and beyond the more you will be come successful in your business goals and life – goes without saying really as one is not separate from the other.

Money and Financial Literacy are not dirty words, but an area which is vast and getting a greater and better understanding of it and how you relate to it and work with it – can only make anything you do better – becoming Financially Literate is the ultimate part of the changes of New Year New You New Start for 2014.

Thank you for reading my musings over the past few weeks and I hope as we end January 2014 to hear from you, that you have enjoyed or gotten something from what I have been saying and might be interested in talking to me about being your coach for the future.

Best wishes and Keep in Touch

Sharon –

New Year New You New Start – Your State of Mind

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New Year New You New Start

Your State of Mind

Start the New You Now – sharing this link to not just Dr Wayne W Dyer but also the link to the website for the free 7 day programme of being able to listen to interviews, online films and articles.

https://www.facebook.com/drwaynedyer/

Start the New You Now is available all weekend – all 7 days of conversations, yoga and the 7 movies are all available free starting right now – if you missed any of the life changing conversations or the movies this is your chance. I highly recommend My Greatest Teacher the movie on day 5 and The Shift movie on Day 6. If you have time I would also listen to Christiane Northrup’s interview on day 1.

enjoy the weekend – here is the link

http://www.hayhousenewyounow.com/listen/

If you have been listening and watching during the week please let others know what you think they should watch or listen to.”

Why not over this weekend take the time to look into it all. You will be so pleased that you have done so and I know you will all get so much more from it all.

Even if you are not full immersed in it all – you will take some thing away from it that will ultimately help you make your life better.

Your State of Mind – is all important in this all

Coaching that I do at SLJ Coaching and Training Associates uses many many techniques and approaches that help support your transitions in life, evaluate where you are currently to where you want to be or go ultimately in your personal and also your business.Looking at were the blocks and hurdles are and supporting you in finding you your solutions to those for ultimate success in your goals for life. I work with you on goal setting, getting the priorities right for you, setting them and then setting out your journey or development plan of how to go about going and achieving those goals.

I work with you on your State of Mind – looking at the New You and how those transformations can spill over into your personal life obviously and also your business life – as your whole approach to things will change.

Remember – what you put out there is what you get back – eg I sometimes feel overwhelmed with not enough hours in the day to do what I want to do – what happens = I never have enough hours in the day to do what I want to do and get frustrated and more and more overwhelmed.

What am I doing now? Shift in thoughts – Looking at my State of MInd – I plan what I need to do – breaking it down into smaller daily jobs in a more thoughtful way in order of priority and I allocate them the time I am able to – I started this only very recently in all areas personal and business and I feel now – instead of waking up and going omg I have too much to do today and not enough time. I wake up and go – ok I have 3 jobs that are needed to be done today – I will do them then and then tick them off the list, if they get finished then great if not then they are top priority list for tomorrow. My feelings of being overwhelmed are reduced and I feel more in control of what I can do and I am doing – and slowly but surely I am doing more as completing tasks rather than being overwhelmed and panicking and doing nothing as previously felt like a rabbit in the headlights stunned into being frozen.

If you correct your mind, the rest of your life will fall into place. -Lao Tzu = Your State of Mind

How wonderful are these words and for all of us so very true in our modern times from way back then – If you correct your mind, the rest of your life will fall into place – for me this has been the journey that I am walking on right this moment and have been journeying towards for some time – slowly but surely the pieces are falling into place as I am getting myself `correct in my mind` and now know that as that happens ` the rest of my life is falling into place`.

 

Small Daily Improvements are the key to staggering long term results – they are in deed very profound words – but often we start (as I have done so many times) in a rush of enthusiasm – lose weight, new business, new projects, decluttering , business adventures – and the list goes on – and then in days or even weeks its set to the side or you give up in frustration and feeling of being overwhelmed and disappointed – as it is not going the way you wanted or at the pace you need etc etc etc.

I often used to say – the Time is not right – what I was waiting for was often the Perfect time to do something – or if the project, idea or something that I was doing did not work out immediately in the perfect way that I planned – it was therefore a failure and stop – then panic and get upset, annoyed, overwhelmed, anxious and more and more frustrated – what I am now realising more and more in my work, my life and my business – is that there is no perfect time – my state of mind was that I wanted Perfectionism – and becasue nothing is ever that perfect or runs that smoothly ( we all wish) then I thought it was a failure and that I had failed – my State of Mind needed fixing.

Now I Think differently and therefore ACT differently – I am now making and have made huge changes in my thought processes, my thinking and this is truly being reflected in my personal and business life – I am ok now with it all and not waiting until the Time is Right – I am doing it Right Now and changing daily.

To keep progressing, you must learn, commit and do – learn, commit and do, and learn, commit, and do it all over and over again – Stephen R. Covey

Make those small daily improvements, change your thoughts, change your state of mind, learn how to do that, commit to doing that and keep doing them over and over again on a daily basis. Learn and commit to becoming in a New Year New You New Start.

Thank you for indulging me in my blogging – as I am learning along with you all also and for that I genuinely appreciate your time, patience and support. x Sharon x

1186139_10151627081873460_1746621977_nemail : sharonjardine@sljassociates.co.uk

www.facebook.com/sharonjardinecoachingandtrainingassociates

https://twitter.com/sharonjardine

 

 

New Year New Start New Self

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New Year  – New Start  New YOU

Well its 3pm Sunday 5th January and I am here online on FB page for next 58 mins to look at our first Coaching session – this morning been playing about with the imovie on the imac and fingers crossed by time end of month comes I might even have learnt how to save and post the contents onto here as well. Now that will be fun and next step for me.

I scheduled in a posting as well to the page of one of my blogs during 2013 – The Power of Believing in Yourself is Key to Success.

I would really like you to read it and share with me your thoughts on it all – I am very open to feedback – being constructive is a must but being open to that feedback is also important and I also recognise that too.

So for me the first session is basically about being honest, truthful and real with yourself and also with that is then acknowledging what you need to do to make changes for yourself.

Starting with you is key to this all – it does not matter how many goals or plans you set out to achieve – if you do not believe that you are the KEY to making your own success – you will ultimately not succeed in achieving those goals or becoming successful or what ever.

Investment in you, Believing in you , having Faith in yourself , Believing you can do it – thats the key to starting out strongly, staying strong and finding strength in yourself – thats the key to any form of success no matter what your goals are personally or in business.

I asked you to write down all the positives and keep only the positives of what went right or you liked or where successful with in 2013 – but you can repeat this for your whole life right back to childhood – you need to see where your strength can come from – but also recognise where you need to work on as we all have the inner voice putting in doubts, telling us we are `not good enough`, ` who do you think you are`, ` what you think you have the skills to be wealthy`, you do not deserve that` and so forth.

Its at those times when we need to really BELIEVE in ourselves that will get us through – and we all need to see evidence of where we have done this before and how we can do it again. then tap into that and use it to our advantage to keep moving onwards towards our goals no matter what they are.

Thats when the truth and honesty with yourself needs to be there – I now realise that I have battled with the inner voice of – not deserving, not good enough, not clever enough, basically never enough – from child hood – but my lifescripts while coming from my parents also came from theirs and so was passed down through generations of Puritan (hesitant to say christianity or religious influences as not looking to point fingers at the church or any religion but its often the `interpretation` of that which is the issue for many – and a thinking of their generations) approaches in their times – now I can either decide to `allow` those lifescripts to dictate to me for rest of my adulthood – OR acknowledge them, where they came from, how they shaped my grandparents and parents upbringing but not allow them to shape mine any further.

I having worked on myself for a while now – still battle the inner voice at times – quite a battle believe me lol – but I am good enough, I do deserve to be wealthy, healthy, happy and successful, I am as entitled to anyone else around me.
While not bullied at school – I felt I never fitted in – never was good enough, smart enough, atttractive enough, slim enough or worthy of people – and so my confidence in my own ability and capability was always low – I slouched alot, gawky teenager but despite a loud and happy mask was at times felt like a very unhappy person – I knew I wanted more but was unsure of how to go about it.
But I am made of stern stuff despite all of this – bloody mindedness is possibly as couple of words to describe me – my father recalls now I always was independent – hence why when opportunity came to leave home I did just that – no harsh words no major issues – just felt time right, as I felt outgrown the area I lived in and in fact Northern Ireland as a whole to be honest – did not move too far to North West Britain but far enough for me – and here I raise my family today.

Hope that makes sense – but over the past 2 years I have really gotten to know more about myself, what makes me tick if you like – the good, the bad and the ugly – some ghosts laid to rest, some ugly aspects made changes and kicked into touch and looking to develop the good further.

New Year New Start New Self

I know now in 2014 that I have more of the skills, knowledge and expertise to not just work more on my coaching but develop my clients and business further – develop my training further and become more and more successful – I believe in myself more now that ever before.
I know I can do it and I know I will do.

So the goals I am setting for myself will also reflect that – in adult hood for various reasons I have struggled with weight – slim and skinny child and teenager – now 3 1/2 stone over healthy weight for woman my height and age – and with underlying health problems.

So I believe that I will look to change my way of thinking about food and lifestyle for this year – and I have set out today with my daughter what I am going to do, when, who with and how. Goals set for each month –

But in general SMART

S – simple – the simpler the better
M – measureable – start, middle and end
A – achieveable – not setting self up to fail but able to challenge yourself at the same time
R – reasonable and realistic – as above
T – Timed or timetabled – put dates of when want things for ie end of week, end of month, 2 months etc do not leave them open – too easy to let go.

Thats it – thats me – sorry long posts – will set up next one for a blog and share on page and we can do it again – will be next Sunday at 6pm and not 3pm as Meghan is performing in a Dance Show with Ballet class.

Sharon
All the posts this week will be related to this – next week
Motivation – what motivates you and why
Keep your journal – I will set a task next week – re Wheel of life and you can download and use for yourself.

New Era of Social Enterprise

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