Coaching Myth or Fact – Faking it until you Make it – Really?
I have heard this mantra bandied about quite a bit and have felt the need or desire to dispell a few myths about it all.
Faking it until you Make it – this is nonsense and a total urban myth in the coaching circles I have been working in, studying in and involved in.
Visualising where you want to be and working towards that end goal always in your mind yes – but Faking it is not what is being stated or intended.
If you want to be a business person – even if not there yet – put on a business suit or what is best for you and portray yourself as successful and business like – YES but do not FAKE it or be FAKE – as sadly this will very quickly be found out and customers and potential clients and fellow business colleagues all dislike fake people and liars – because if you fake there what else are you fake about.
FACT
Portray the type of business or business person, or person you want to be or aspire to be – coaching supports people setting themselves goals to make changes on how they conduct themselves, their business and what your portray out there to clients, potential customers and colleagues.
MYTH
You need to fake it.
This is a huge NO NO NO. Maybe its me – but if I thought anything about a business was not true – even a small part of what being said is false or a lie – then I begin to become mistrustful of that business person and what they are delivering, product selling and business in general and want nothing more to do with them. Its the greatest mistake I see out there as a coach – business, performance or personal development.
Be yourself, be your own authentic self – you do not need to be someone else or pretend to be someone else – I know I am a good coach, I know I am an honest person, I know I know my business and I know I can back it up with evidence of where what I say I do I actually have done and still continue to do. Honesty and integrity is important not just in my work and my field – but in anyones work, business, niche, service, or with themselves as a person.
I felt I wanted to state this today , as I see and sadly hear so many – `claiming` they are so successful, so busy, so this and so that – when reality is the total opposite – state things about their work that is so obviously not factual or correct but continuing to do it as it makes them look like they are experts, or successful etc etc etc but unfortunately have NO evidence to back their claims up to show that they are or will be in the future – and in fact, their claims will come back to `bite them in the ass` when found out to be untrue and incorrect.
Coaching is not about manifesting your goals by hiding behind lies, deceit or fakery – its about making changes, expanding your language and goal orientation and ambitions and desires – visualising where you want to be, how you want to look, feel, work and what you want to have, but putting in steps to obtain and achieve those goals and beginning to live as if you had those goals already – if you want to be successful, learn from people who are successful, and emulate that in how you go about obtaining your success. But not faking it – making it by doing it, making it by changing it and making it by knowing you can and will do it – you do not need to fake that – do you?
You can start right now…
Sit down and visualise where do you want to be in 5 years time, 2 years time, 1 years time, 6 months time, 1 month from now. Write it down – what does it look like, feel like, does it have a colour, is there an image, does it have a smell, – draw it, create it, dream it – then keep that in your minds eye and start right now looking to live by it – decide what steps you need to take to get there – is that the 1 month, 6 month, 1 year, 2 year plan to get to where you want to be in 5 years. Make those changes now, stop talking – you do not need to fake it – be you just make those changes you need to make to get you where you want to be, where your business needs to be – being a fake is not part of that picture and never will be.
JUST BE YOU – JUST BE YOUR OWN AUTHENTIC SELF – that has value that is real and that is how I can work with you to do just that – no faking, no pretending – just being real but doing it.
So over next few weeks I am going to blog my realities of setting up my own business, how it was not successful in the early days, how hard I have had to work and continue to work, what I am having to do to work on ME now so I can get to being a better coach and business person – thats my honesty to you because it is not easy.
And FAKING it or PRETENDING that I am successful or working with people or clients would not be any use to me and in fact would LOSE me potential customers, clients and colleagues and business – I am who I am – if I am the coach for you – great, but if not fine there are others who do things differently and they might be a BETTER match to what your needs are. That is REALITY and I do not want to FAKE it until I make it – I WANT IT REAL AND REAL FOR ME and I am sure you want it REAL FOR YOU also.
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