Stress – How it can Kill You if You Let it.

Posted on 10.24.15 | 1 Comment

Stress – How it can Kill You if You let it.

Part 1 of my journey of change – the voice of my heart.

Past career – past stresses

I walked away from a job in 2011 after 20 years that was over the last 5 years of it killing me – all because of stress – I failed to recognise the signs and symptoms and also thought I was invincible and super woman.
In early October 2010 I just about made it home – I know I drove home stupid I know I know – and within 15 minutes went into a sudden cardiac attack – ie my heart went into melt down – and I was having a huge arrhythmia attack.

Most sudden cardiac deaths are caused by abnormal heart rhythms called arrhythmias. The most common life-threatening arrhythmia is ventricular fibrillation, which is an erratic, disorganized firing of impulses from the ventricles (the heart’s lower chambers). When this occurs, the heart is unable to pump blood and death will occur within minutes, if left untreated.

All this from stress – I was taken into hospital where I was given medication that stopped my heart and restarted it again to attempt to get the arrhythmia back on track and slow down – as the next stage was full cardiac arrest – (sounds very dramatic and scary – it was I have never consciously held onto a nurse and consultants hands so much in my life and just begged them to help me) – 3 days later I left hospital and told that I was in need of some serious help – but I what I got was some serious help from the best Heart Hospital and consultant in Europe at Broadgreen.

I went in on 29th April 2011 and my operation was 88% successful – apparently they had fun playing space invaders in my heart – Left ventricular de-fibrillation is what Mr Mark Hall did – thank god I was asleep – but next time I apparently need to stay awake eeek – hence why putting off for as long as I can.

I know for me its taken me a few years to actually really try to address and stop the stress impact and its consequences on me – I get stressed easily, I tended to over personalise things – if it went wrong it was because I was at fault, I was the problem, I am to blame – I continued to batter myself on leaving work, worry about money, worry about kids, worry about me – hit menopause lost the plot – flitted all over the place trying to find what I wanted to do – lost a heap of money, friends, because of some of the issues thought I was losing my sanity and my marriage and thought I had lost me. I thought life what shit to be honest.

The year from hell – ok I just lost my way!

2014 turned out to be the best and the worst year – you would have thought 2011 was – but nope – I am a slow burner – and I burnt and smouldered and hurt myself until November 2014 and I woke up from a bit of a fog – fuck me did I wake up (apologies for swearing if offended but I actually do swear).
I looked around me and made a choice to change – (thought I had as had read and listened to all the self help, spiritual stuff and people, books and videos ) but it all just kept nothing at bay and the shite kept coming – and then I looked at me, really looked at me and decided I needed to just stop.
So I did – and then good things started happening – not huge things or at fast paces but small little things – and things begun to change.

As you can see from the video – its all about learning to manage your stress and recognising what the causes are and how to combat them – don`t do what I did for so long – ignore, fight and under estimate what stress can do – both to you and those you love around you – I was a martyr and a warrior but realised the only one I was hurting was those I loved around me and me – the total opposite to what I wanted or thought I was doing . Stupid yes absolutely.

Never under estimate your past – learn from it and move on

In 1995 and in 1996 I nearly died from Eclampsia – my daughters where both still born but I was lucky I was alive, on both occasions they fought to save my life and thank goodness they did – sadly the longer term impact both emotionally and mentally were much more long lasting than the physical impact. But on both occasions I went into cardiac arrest – possibly this was the first real signs I had a heart problem – who knows but I had in 2010 been given a 3rd chance to get it right and for so so long I had – like so many other women – just got on with life. Took it all in my stride, worked harder, did not give up (fought hard to have kids born alive and well and me well) and just kept up the warrior mode and of course being super woman – I did it all.

I fought for everyone – Trade Union secretary, spokesperson at conferences, extra work, degrees and qualifications, work work work, lived hard and played hard – and did not realise just how miserable I was making myself – the mask was on and the sword was in hand.

Then my world (created and designed by me) fell apart, I had taken the voluntary redundancy and my grieving for a career, job and identity began and continued – of course it did, this was me living in chronic stress mode again – cycle of learnt behaviour for me and a coping strategy I only knew.

Post attack but in denial

From 21012 – 2014 I was in denial and fear – adding more and more un-necessary stress to a world I did not need – and while it was better than when in a full time job and career prior to October 2010 it was really just a smaller version of what had been happening then. I got into negative thought patterns, negative behaviour patterns and it was like the self destruct button was under my finger and regularly just being tested to see how far I would take me or my family to the edge of pressing.

By grief was so deep rooted and that I felt my whole identity was so wrapped up in my work and career, I thought it was me – so losing all that was like grieving for a part of me that had died and maybe I was taking myself there unconsciously.

Decision to change – I woke up from a fug

Then as I said I made a decision to change – I knew I was losing my sanity as it was insanity to keep doing the same thing over and over again and expect different results. Was there an aha moment – sadly I had had a few, but choose to ignore them in 2012, 2013 but the one in 2014 was driving in the car from a part time job taken and just pulled over side of road and sobbed – I hated it. What did I want ? What was I going to do ? How was I going to make those changes? I was at a loss – but for the first time I woke up from a fug – a fog so deep set that I had just been living and not really doing anything more – I knew then that I wanted more but most of all I deserved more, my kids and hubby deserved more and they deserved the happy fun me the real me – the me they loved – but the I needed to get back to loving me and me then being able to really love them all back – love the world back – be me. So I drove home, sat hubby down – kids got into it all too lol – and they just told me to stop hurting myself and start doing what I loved.

Literally the next day – a friend from past asked me to do some work with her in local school and so it all began to change. I began to really see what changes I could make, what choices I have and what chances I have been given.

I started 2015 as I promised I would start it – making changes – positive changes.
I started with money , my love life/ marriage, my family, my business, my friends and through out them all myself. The most important one I often sadly forgot about or used to abuse.

Its Emotional – but good

Its been an emotional year so far – not all has gone smoothly but slowly but surely things are improving – and I know I am at the end of the year ie now also changing other negative behaviours re food and relationship to food and weight – which has just been thrown in there as well lol.

But most of all I am finding what makes me smile, laugh and enjoy life again – hormones don`t help but hey thats the joys of aging and being female …… and I cry alot – just getting it all out, trying to stop being that warrior woman getting angry annoyed, frustrated and so forth – adverts get me going, doesn`t have to take much – but its a source of huge fun in the house – who can get mum sobbing over daft things lol. But its ok –

I have been able to look more and more in the mirror over this year and put the pieces of me back together again – some good people have helped, some via business who are now good good close friends and others via knitting who are now getting more and more close as friends. Others I have let go and thats ok – my circle of friends is rather small but my networking of colleagues is rather large.

Hubby and me – getting on better, marriage sorted – we still have a few pings in the ring now and again – I am an aries and he is libra – says it all – me quick to react him slow burner – but we are 25 years married and 27 years together so I think holding our own.

Kids – I am blessed – nothing more needs said.

Business & BizMums Networking

Business – well thats on the improvement side – the Knitting Fairy has come out and proud, freelancing working away and its all just moving from strength to strength – even got into the finals of BizMums Awards – Creative Business 2015 – so not all bad then

So can stress kill you? Yes it bloody well can so why are you allowing it to.

Chronic stress over long long periods of time is a silent killer and often many cardiac deaths are caused by it all – please please do not allow this time little word get so much play time in your life and have the huge impact that it will do to you and those you love around you.

Take action now – do not live with regrets – I know I am not any longer allowing chronic stress to have a heart hold on me or my families lives – I want to be around for a rather long time, to spend time with my kids, see them into adult hood, their own families and be a grandparent. I want to spend time with my grumpy ole fella who I adore and want a retirement where we can be there for one another into old age.

Business wise – I no longer want to the have any regrets and my vision of big is now what I am talking about and wanting to put our there.

So don`t let stress kill you – don`t let chronic stress get a grip.

How to have more Self Confidence

Posted on 07.4.15 | Leave a Comment

Have you ever wondered how to have more self-confidence?

In this video Dr. Joseph shares the 4 things that make all the difference when it comes to feeling confident. This is an amazing TEDX talk, well worth watching…

You can have more self-confidence!

I will share 4 ways that you can do to help you to have more self-confidence – these are;

1. PRACTICE, PRACTICE, PRACTICE

If you want to have more confidence you have to practice the skill or task you’re doing until you feel confident. If you want to be a great speaker, you have to practice your speech over and over and over again – in the mirror, with your family, with friends, with strangers, until you feel so confident, because you’ve worked to be the best you can be.

I am finding that I do this more and more how do you get to being successful or confident about what you do if you do not practice for example – I have refined and redefined my networking 60 second pitch and through the help of getting great advice from fellow business colleagues, research and redefining who I am and what I want others to know who I am – I am now in the stage of practice, practice, practice.

Do you practice ? If not how will you get to be the best that you can be? Get out there practice, practice and practice some more – as Dr Joseph shares in this video this is how great athletes and sports people get to the top of their game, this is how great business people get to the level of great success that they have – practice practice practice and even when you think you are done practice it all again a bit more.

2. GET GOOD SELF-TALK

We all have this negative self-talk that goes in our head. But guess what, there’s enough other people telling us we can’t do it, that we’re not good enough, so why do we want to tell ourselves that? We know for a fact that thoughts influence actions… so we need to get our own self-affirmations.

Recognising your own negative self talk is a good starting point for change. Then stop it and start the process of change immediately – look in that mirror each and every morning you get up and start with your own positive and good self – talk and get your own self-affirmations.

For me I found this really difficult at the start but I am learning to challenge that negative self talk and re-connect again with the good and positive self talk about me – as a person, as a parent, as a business person and as a person who is successful. I am great, I love what I do, I am passionate about what I do and I do it because I am bloody good at coaching people, supporting people and I am successful. Find your own self affirmations and start doing this now – with days or even weeks what the difference – you will start to stand taller and believe in yourself much more.

ps – stop hanging around others whose self talk to themselves and others is negative – you will never change if you are surrounding yourself with negative people – I promise you that.

3. WRITE A SELF-CONFIDENCE LETTER TO YOURSELF

When you’re feeling confident and positive in your life, take the time to write a letter to your future self about the things that you’re proud of.

Dr. Joseph says the reason to do this is…

because there are moments, and we’ll all experience them, in our career, in our life, in our job hunting, in our relationships, when we are not feeling good about who, what and where we are.

It’s in those moments that you need to get our your letter to help you get through the storm.

When I watched this video and listened to Dr Joseph I decided to do just that – as someone who has suffered from depression over the years and can easily slip into that negative self talk phase this has proved to be an absolute little gem – get your pen out and write yourself that self-confidence letter. List all the things that you have been successful at over the years, all the things that are good for you, and I mean everything.

This I keep in my office on my wall – especially for those days as pointed out by Dr Joseph that we all get, because we all do get moments when we do not feel great about ourselves and this helps to knock those days out of the ball park and get us back on track in being more confident about ourselves. Focus on the positive things not the negative – after all the says goes

What you focus on is what grows and develops

So focus on positive always.

4. SELF-CONFIDENT PEOPLE INTERPRET FEEDBACK THE WAY THEY CHOOSE TO

When something doesn’t go your way, how do you choose to interpret it? How do you choose to respond? Self-confident people choose to respond in a positive way, that helps them to keep moving forward.

I used to think that I was not successful, not popular, not business orientated, and lots of “I can`t do that” moments.

What changed? Me realising that I was all of those things and so much more – plus working on my self confidence, self talk and staying positive no matter what. That’s what changed? I tapped into myself – and looked back to help me look forward. I read, I listened and I began to practice to get my own self confidence back again.

Now post redundancy, 4 years post redundancy, I now know that I am all the things I thought I was not – successful, popular and I am running my business in a way that suits me and what I do. I am a successful parent and that my self talk is about working to my strengths focusing on what I can do and staying strong on it all.

I hope this all helps you in knowing how to have more self confidence.

Enjoy

Self confidence actions for you to do immediatley

1. Write yourself your letter or make your list.

2. Put the letter or list prominently for you to see and read it when you feel that your confidence is slipping or you are just having one of those days.

3. Write out your own self affirmations and do the same again.

4. Every morning before you do anything else – say your self affirmations and practice.

Thank you xx

The Benefits of Coaching

Posted on 01.9.15 | Leave a Comment

The Benefits of Coaching

The Benefits of Coaching.

You need to know what the benefits of coaching are and will be when you work with me in our coaching sessions. But also the benefits of coaching need to be seen as an investment in YOU and that you deserve to have this invest – and these are the reasons why.

Increase your self – confidence
Gives you more motivation
Makes you more self – awareness and understanding
Gives you more clarity in making decisions, choices and judging situations
Allows you to have a more fulfilling life/work balance
Allows you to work on expanding your horizons
Supports you in lessening your stress
Gives you better skills for better communication skills
Supports you gaining better relationships
Supports you gain better health and well-being routines eg diet, exercise.
You feel supported and not alone as you work to achieve your goals
It gives you time to reflect on what is important to you and who you really aspire to be.

When you work with a coach – working as a coach in the way that I do with SLJ Coaching & Training Associates – you can focus on what is really important to you and start to look to shape your life to be more in line with your values. Working with me will provide you an effective structure to support you moving forward in significant areas of your life, including career, your business, personal growth, relationships, family, friends, health, education, work, spirituality, fun and recreation, and your physical environment.

When you work with me as a coach – I support and encourage you to be and take responsibility for the results you generate, ultimately you as everyone is responsible for your own life and the results they get.

When we work in this way and take responsibility for your own life, we have power and influence over it. We can then appreciate our own influence in situations and that we can choose between different possibilities.

When you work with me in this way it works, coaching works, because you are making the commitment to invest in yourself, with focused support to help you find clarity, self confidence and the motivation to continue and overcome barriers. Often we don`t really take the time to work out where we are going, what our lives are about, and what our values and goals are.

If you do not know what you are doing, or want to go, you are unable to focus or have ineffective habits that you are not fully aware of and that will hold us back.

Very often, we unconsciously or consciously resist change, because its easier and more comfortable to stay the way you are, even if it not what you truly want.

Working with me as a Coach helps you to overcome these barriers and make the changes you want, to step out of your comfort zone and test the waters of the stretch zone in a supportive and safe environment.

I empower and aspire you in my coaching for you to find your passion, your purpose and fulfil your full potential in your life and all the avenues of your life.

Sharon Jardine

Coach & Mentor

Guided Meditation In Coaching

Posted on 04.5.14 | Leave a Comment

Guided Meditation In Coaching

Guided Meditation in Coaching can bring about deeper and longer lasting positive change for the future – I can hear the deep breathes already even before I have started – REALLY – I hear you ask.

Well yes – I am finding that the more work I am doing with people keeps taking me back to an interest and passion I have always had around me to do with this side of my work. Meditation, relaxation, therapies that can sit with people to help them – getting to know yourself from the inside out – touching base with your inner person, inner self, inner goddess – who ever it might be – but touching base there and HEALING many of the deep rooted issues there, before moving on to becoming more successful personally and in career or business.

Using it to work on my self is so beneficial – the clouds or fog of confusion and lack of clarity are lifting and I believe I am in a better frame of mind, knowing and understanding of what it is I want, what my goals and ambitions are and also being more calm, more in control and greater enabled to become focused on HOW I am going to go about getting them.

Guided Meditation In Coaching don`t necessarily sit together in the purest of senses according to many – but for me I really think they do – not everyone is business savvy in how they approach things, many of my clients need space and time to work out what to focus on first and how to get the space to be able to do that.

Using Guided Meditation techniques in my Coaching sessions – where it is requested and agreed to – does just that – we spend a bit of the session focusing on the guided meditation and then discuss what the meditation brought about for them and decide on action plans for the future – goals can become clearer and focus is more defined and clarity is there as the client is less stressed, more relaxed and able to get to what they really want to focus on rather than it often getting jumbled up in the chaos and jabber that often surround many of us when trying to make changes in our lives. The inner self talk can be a powerful tool for good but it can also cause self doubt and sabotage on being able to get to where we want to go far too easily.

Hence why Guided Meditation & Coaching works for me with some of my clients – not all want to use it but its one that I use with increasing frequency.

Often primarily in the early days of the coaching relationship and then many clients go on to want just meditation sessions as it allows them space and time to focus on what they want for themselves and to learn to get better at it and hone the skill of meditation more.

What is Guided Meditation?

Guided meditation is when you are guided, by a narrator, to elicit a specific change in your life. You are first guided to relax your body and mind, to help you reach a deep meditative state before going on a journey, in your mind, to reach a specific goal.

As the brain does not distinguish between an imagined event and a real one, the experience you have with a guided meditation is just like having a real experience. This has an amazing effect on your life due to the way the brain works.

There are many studies that show that practicing something in your mind is almost as good as practicing it in real life.

The beauty of a guided meditation is that you can bring about change in your body by using your mind, and that means activating muscles, changing your biological state, and even changing the way the cells in your body work.

Pay attention! Here comes the science bit

I am often asked why guided meditation is so effective, so I would like to give you a little science behind guided meditation, and why it benefits you so much.

If you think of your mind as being an MP3 player, with hundreds of songs uploaded. All the songs on this MP3 player represent a program that dictates the way you think, act and behave in certain situations. These programs have been installed since your childhood and more added as you’ve aged.

So, for example if you were told, as a child that you were no good at maths, a program has been installed in your subconscious mind telling you that you’re no good at maths. Years later as an adult, someone asks you how to do a calculation for something, you quickly tell them ‘Oh, I don’t know I’m no good at maths.’ Your brain doesn’t even try the calculation as it takes it for granted that you’ll never be able to do it as you’re no good at maths.

The fascinating part about all of this is that the programs have not only been written and stored in the brain, but stored in the very cells of your body. The brain has literally created a path, a neural network, to coordinate your actions based on environmental factors, which speaks to the cells in your body.

If you stop to think about the implications of this for a second, you’ll realize that our genes do not determine who we are; it’s the images we create in our minds of ourselves that determine who we are.

We have thousands of programs written into our subconscious mind, and each program will determine how we think, act and behave in any given situation. The trouble is, it’s extremely difficult to change these programs without some type of way to access the subconscious mind to rewrite the programs, and make a new neural pathway that will communicate effectively with the cells and genes in our body.

Guided meditation has the power to reach your subconscious mind, by feeding it images, sounds, and directing your imagination to experience all your senses, thereby giving your brain an experience of what feels like a real experience. When you have a real experience new neural pathways are made that affect your whole body, so when you listen to a guided meditation from GuidedMind your are literally rewiring your brain to form new neural pathways for your future success.

So now looking at Guided Meditation and Coaching you can see how sort of `hot wiring` your brain to think differently will support you in your journey to make changes, working on your goals, action planning for the future and how in coaching, mentoring it is a great way and another tool in supporting you in that journey and ultimately getting your goals, desires, dreams, ambitions and all that you want to work towards success either personally, in business or career or performance in a job.

Contact me for more details – I will be running Guided Meditation workshops and sessions locally but sign up to my newsletter by contacting me on

sharonjardine@sljassociates.co.uk or sign up via contact on the website.

https://www.facebook.com/sharonjardinecoachingandtrainingassociates

Be Your Own Life Coach

Posted on 03.4.14 | 1 Comment

Be your own Life Coach

Making and taking tough decisions is not always easy but starting with being your own Life Coach is vital.

Being focused on yourself is the most important point and the very beginning of any one persons journey – let me support you being your own Life Coach in this vital starting point for yourself and learn what I know will make long lasting changes, transformational changes, to you, both personally and professionally in your business or career for the future.

I will share with you over the coming weeks – case studies of where I have worked with real people such as you on making those changes and how working with me can do the same or similar for you.

But start with you – do some of the ground work yourself – get an interest in being your own Life Coach as well – start the changes now and realise that you matter and that you are that important.

Be your own Life Coach – I started doing exactly just that – hey who coaches coaches.

Fiona Harrold – be your own life coach.

http://Be Your Own Life Coach: How to Take Control of Your Life and Achieve Your Wildest Dreams

This little book started such a huge change in my life – I had already been making and taking tough decisions on making long term changes in my career, setting up in business and also some in my personal life. But what this book did was open a window a fraction of space for me to see how much more work I needed to do ….. on ME – nothing else just ME.

I now follow Fiona`s work and coaching and I admire her approach as a Coach that I would like to emulate and role model. I have had the privilege of being on a coaching programme she ran in 2013 and this further galvanised me to refocus and get to know with greater depth and clarity what I really wanted for me and my future.

This small book started a domino effect of getting for myself my own coach – both looking at my business and myself on a personal basis and realising the impact this investment could have on all areas of my life – not just where I thought it would be in.

Thats why I highly recommend not just this book, but also starting with yourself – be your own life coach – if you do not see the benefit of it all, then it does not matter how many, or who or what you get coaching in and around either your business or personal – you will just be given tools but have no motivation, no interest or see no value or worth in those tools. Then they are just a waste of time, energy, finances and effort. Basically you will only go so far and will very quickly slip back into bad habits and unsuccessful ways of being, working and running your life or your business.

Mine in the early days was all about believing in myself, getting rid of self doubt and having self worth.

Recently I have gone back and re read Fiona Harrolds book as I have been following her on Facebook and also doing some webinars and coaching sessions with her as well – following on from all of this I actually took up an investment of a coaching programme with her and the benefits catapulted me forward in both my personal and also my business life.

I realised I needed to invest in me and to do that I needed not just a good coach but a great coach – one who I could connect with and that is what I got on that coaching programme. She has from this little book and me focusing on myself as being my own coach, me to realise that I could use all my skills, expertise and years of experience and be an excellent coach in turn to others who work alongside me. That is now what I offer from me just being my own Life Coach.

Now while coaching other people is not what everyone else is going to do – having a good coach is what everyone needs and that is now what I offer and I know that my clients receive. I will share with you over the coming blogs some of those case studies of clients and organisations I have worked with – how and where coaching has worked for them and why they see the worth and value to them of a Coach on both a personal and business level.

Coaching is about making and taking tough decisions – we often do not realise how much we sabotage ourselves and our businesses or potential for successful futures. So read this little gem and start the journey by being your own coach and enjoy.

www.facebook.com/sharonjardinecoachingandtrainingassociates

Twitter : @sharonjardine

Sharon Jardine – email : sharonjardine@sljassociates.co.uk

Are you ready to change challenge? Day 4

Posted on 08.20.13 | Leave a Comment

Are you ready to change challenge? Day 4

Over previous few days been asking you to really look hard at yourself and WHY you do and WHY you think as you do – previous self limiting beliefs and conditioning from your past is so too often the reason why people are not successful or happy with what or how they do things.

Are you ready to change challenge? Day 4 – is all about putting that all behind you – I know as said in previously blogs this is only a small part a small fraction of the work that I do with you in a coaching session and set up but it gives you the flavours of what you can do – either through looking at your own journey to change or your own journey of change – reading booking of Life Coaching or other self made people – people of success and finding out what they did – especially if they have originally come from similar backgrounds to yourself. Often the biggest obstacle to success, happiness and your future is YOU – no one else just You – resolve the issues of the past, let them go, move on and rewrite what it is you really want – who you really want to be, set your goals and go for it. I have already pointed you in the direction of an Author who I have read and loved her approach, work and ethos.

Are you ready to change challenge? Day 4 is about embedding good habits into your daily routine and day – do you know about Affirmations – mediation time – well every morning and every night I want you to start doing some Affirmations – you can do them to a mirror, when in bed, before go to bed or get up in the morning, out loud or silently to yourself. BUT do them!

Just one positive thought in the morning can change your whole day.

Here are some affirmations you can use, or make up your own – but use only positive words and language! After all, you have been using negative affirmations for years – you need to practice now the positive ones to affirm the new you, new image and new start.

Write them in your journal or print them out and pin them where you can see them every day.

* I like myself

* I now take responsibility for making my life work

* My future is full of interesting surprises and wonderful opportunities

* I am good enough

* I now know I deserve to have more fun, laughter, money and success

* I approve of myself completely, including in the presence of others

* I now choose to like and trust myself and to treat myself with the utmost respect

Repeat them daily – change your self talk to yourself – respect yourself in this new you, new image and new start to care about you and that means to respect yourself – and believe in yourself 100% that you will be and can be successful – remember I asked you for 4 things and self belief and self discipline were 2 of them – this is were the self discipline comes in big time – repeat daily and especially over 30 + days and journal the difference it can make over the coming month or 2 – seriously you will be surprised by the simple but big difference it can make.

Are you ready to change challenge? Day 4 is about “for me” – you showing yourself the respect you need to begin your transformation – metaphorically of course, but hey I am not stopping anyone from making other changes in themselves if that is what you want to do – go for it – I believe in you and trust you 100% to know what your changes need to be and how much you want them.

On my journey I have been making big huge changes – physically, emotionally and psychologically – all have contributed to massive changes happening then all around me within my personal life, family life and business life – I am not perfect nor ever would claim to be – but you know what I have stopped punishing myself, putting myself down (still have to remind that inner voice to stop being critical but getting there) and believing in myself that I have the self discipline and self reliance and resources to be successful in everything that I do – as I do and I can.

Are you ready to change challenge? Day 4 – Well are you? Are you really ready to change?

I trust that you are and motivated to really get stuck in – keep your journal, contact me for 1:1 sessions or email/phone coaching details also.

Taking these 7 steps – 1 each day is the start – start to change and enjoy the transformation and enjoy becoming the successful, happy and motivated person that you want to be and can be – respect yourself to be able to do it.

Are you ready to change challenge – day 3

Posted on 08.17.13 | Leave a Comment

Are you ready to change challenge – day 3

Well yesterday was a tough day as I asked you to challenge yourself and ask yourself some tough questions – asking questions about our limiting beliefs is about getting to the root cause of why sometimes we are stopped in our tracks in achieving all that we want – we sabotage ourselves and enforce our negative inner voice/ self talk and therefore feel we fail or do not succeed because we ultimately have been conditioned to from our past.

Are you ready to change – the challenge for day 3 – New you new image new start

You now have some insights on how you operate as a person – you have written out and recognised those beliefs that you have about yourself and those that have been told to you repeatedly over the past years from childhood or even later in adulthood. But why are you allowing these damaging and controlling beliefs to influence you – now we need to get you working on a new you – not a total change (no personality transplants or anything like that – keeping all the good and lovely things that are you and contribute to you being a unique and individual person) but getting rid of the bad belief systems that you have been conditioned to hearing and believing about yourself for years.

Are you ready to change challenge – day 3 – new you new image new start

This is only a short and brief view into the world of coaching and the coaching process – this is what it is all about – it can be fast, challenging and demanding – I demand a lot from my clients afterall thats what it is all about – making positive and progressive changes – challenging the old ways of doing things and looking for the new ways and solutions to resolving problems – I believe in you that you can do it, make the changes and grow as a person to becoming a more fulfilled, happier, peaceful and resourceful person. You are your own key to success – dig deep folks and believe me you have it all there – we just need to get the tweaking and tuning right and then off you go and begin to really live the life you truly want to live – both personally and in business – thats the power of coaching.

So Are you ready to change challenge – day 3 is now to work on you – the new you the new image and new start – and we have not even begun to look at the future processes of goal setting or goals for your future or anything – working on you is the start of the journey and what an exciting journey it is going to be and is already.

Are you ready to change challenge – day 3 – Yes I hear you shout – well ok shout it louder and lets begin.

Day 3 – Journal exercise; Complete the following statements………..

a. The person I am choosing to be from this day on is someone who is ………..

b. The qualities I most want to emphasise and enjoy in myself are………..

When finished Write this out somewhere – either in the journal or on a separate piece of paper sign and date it – even start a mood board – cork board and cut out inspirational sayings, things you want to work for, photos of self of weight and image you want to achieve (be real as well do not set yourself up to fail). I have one in my study for each of my businesses and personal one – I have photos of types of villa want to buy when retire – goal and target, what I want for next car, I have printed out date and weight I want to be by christmas and then next year etc ) helps in visualising what I would like both in material terms and also saying that inspire me and things I want to aspire to re short, medium and long term goals in my life and businesses.

Statement:

“I am now ready to give life to this new image of myself, from this day forth. I commit to reinforcing these qualities until they are a deeply ingrained part of who I am and who I am seen to be.”

Print this out and put it in a prominent position for you to read and see often. Now from today onwards your behaviour, choices and decisions you want to make sure they fit this description of you. When you are faced with a choice or a decision ask yourself – What is the answer, given the person I am now? I will also recommend a book to read now also – as I have found of all the books I have read recently has really resonated a lot with me personally.

http://www.amazon.co.uk/Your-Own-Life-Coach-ebook/dp/B0043VD6BC/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1376748247&sr=8-1&keywords=fiona+harrold

Read Fiona Harrolds books and check out for yourself how powerful a world coaching can be both for yourself and your business – her books are excellent to read and easy starting points for your journey into becoming a new you and having a new start.

Enjoy and have fun – remember this is the start of an exciting journey of self discovery into the new you that you want to be – this new you and new start will be being as unique as you were before but becoming more successful and achieving more of the life that you want to have rather than been told you should have – work on you as starting point and everything will eventually fall into place.

Good luck and lets look forward to Day 4 of the challenge.

Are you ready to change challenge – Day 2

Posted on 08.16.13 | Leave a Comment

Are you ready to change challenge – Day 2

Yesterday I asked you to answer 2 questions;

Who do you think you are? and Who do you need to think you are to have the life you want?

Why did I ask these 2 questions? Because we need to start with understanding of ourselves and how we see ourselves and especially how you see yourself.

Are you ready to change challenge today is about our own Self belief in ourselves, challenging the self limiting beliefs that we have of ourself, our abilities, talents, business ability and right to be successful or even happy with our life, our selves and what we do or who we are.

We need to believe in ourselves (in yourself) 100%, when you view yourself as being worthy of everything good that you can do or create for yourself and regard yourself as worthy of only the best – then you begin to create a world around you that is positive,successful and happy because basically anything becomes possible. I am not talking about money or finances here – I am talking about living a life that you deserve – happiness, peaceful, financial freedom (it will come if you focus on working on it positively and productively), successful and worthy of deserving all these things. We need to focus on our good qualities and our strengths but all too often we find ourselves being negative, focusing on our bad qualities, using negative self talk, focusing on our weaknesses and surrounding ourselves with those people who just back all of that up – after all its easier to do that – and many of our own self limiting beliefs from our childhood and past also back that up too – I am not worthy, I do not deserve being happy, successful, financial freedom, its too hard to work that hard, its too much for me, I can not lose this weight, I am not that smart – oh its always me – poor me poor me poor me blah blah blah blah – we allow our inner self talk and our past dictate who we are and what we are doing now, and what we want to do in the future. Hence we form the `bad` habits of not believing in ourselves and now working on ourselves and making ourselves personally or in business successful – first small defeat or failure – give up and tick the box of more evidence of why we are not worthy of success or happiness.

STOP IT NOW – are you ready for the change challenge?

You said you were ready to commit – you said you are ready for the change challenge – you agreed to the 4 things I asked of you.

Motivation, Self Belief, Self Discipline and Willingness to Challenge yourself.

So do it now – from yesterdays questions put your past behind and focus only on the future – we have been working on being positive, using positive language, being around positive people living positive no matter where. I know its not easy but start forming the good habits for yourself now for your future – small steps become huge steps and great movements forward – and are the format for making long term habits for successful lives and successful living.

Are you ready to change? – challenge then your self limiting beliefs, let go of the past that is holding you back, silence your negative self talk/ inner voice – Believe in you 100%

Are you ready to change challenge – start today Believe in yourself – believe you are worthy, deserving and that you can and will be successful and that you will achieve that person you need to be to have the life you want. Otherwise you will continue to stay in exactly the same place you are now and have exactly the same results you have now – you are reading this blog and following this challenge for a reason – go on you have nothing to lose and all to gain.

Are you ready to change challenge – You have the motivation now as committed to change – you are now starting that journey of self belief and believing in yourself 100% that you can do it. Now have the discipline to keep on that track over these last 5 days and have the willingness to challenge yourself – start making the changes towards having the life that you want – personal or business.

Day 2 – Journal – write in this your responses to these statements;

The limiting beliefs I hold about myself are……………………….

The 3 limiting beliefs that hold me back most of all are……………………

From these responses to these statements you now have all the information you need about the most damaging and restrictive ways in which you see yourself. These last 3 main ones show you how powerful their influences have over your life – lets look at changing those beliefs and no longer let your past conditioning influence your life any longer.

1 more for today please if that is ok – I ask you 1 more exercise to do – then tomorrow we are going to move onwards – to leaving them behind and moving on to the new you and leaving them all behind in the past.

Write down in your journal

The cost to me, in my life, of my limiting beliefs is……. (write down 5, no more than 10)

This can be difficult and upsetting – but do not dwell on this long – write them down recognise them for what they are but dwell no longer than necessary acknowledge them and then let go of them.

Are you ready to change challenge – it is now time to let go of the past and begin building your future – tomorrow onwards.

Good luck, have fun with this and enjoy.

Day 1 – Are you ready to change Challenge?

Posted on 08.15.13 | 2 Comments

Day 1 – Are you ready to change Challenge?

Day 1 of the challenge is to find out if you are ready to commit to the challenge of change. Are you ready to have a week of challenges to give you a little insight in to coaching and also about how to go about moving towards the life you really want.

Coaching moves people forward, fast and easily – so lets start on the journey of change and of you reaching your full and true potential.

Ok – becoming ready for change is about committing to the process of looking at where you are now and what or where you want to be in the future. This is only a short 7 day challenge but together during this change challenge we will look at your life together and I will ask you to be tough on yourself as I want you to commit to action, not talk or excuses but action – become a can do approach rather than `I can`t do that , or I am not able to do that, not yet, not now, maybe later.` Not good enough – if you follow this (its only 7 days and I am asking a small committment here really in the scheme of life of things) make it work for you – what have you got to lose?

Are you ready to change challenge

1. Looking at focusing on the here, now and the future – making small steps making small changes – progression forward – always forward

2. Looking at whats working and what is not and being honest in this with your self.

If its yes to all above.

Then lets make a contract to work with one another for 1 wekk – 7days – let commit to being ready or becoming ready to change.

My committment to you

I will commit to working with you – asking questions and giving direction and challenge. That I believe in your full potential to do all you can and I believe in you 100% with no judgements and I will bring 100% of myself to you in this 7 day journey.

Your committment to – being ready to change challenge

What I need from you are 4 things;

*Motivation: vital – you have to want change, you have to be prepared to work at change – if you are willing to do something then your motivation should be high and you are ready to do what changes are needed.

*Self – Belief: Here is how you believe in yourself deep inside – are you worthy or deserving of good things ie what good things your changes bring to you you accept and enjoy them. Otherwise you will sabotage yourself and your work to keep you from changing and back in your old ways of thinking and believing in yourself – do not under estimate the power of your inner voice for good and not so good in our lives. Your self-belief might not be brilliant at the moment but we will work on that.

*Self-discipline: vital – because when the going gets tough it is your self discipline that keeps you moving forward. Change brings sometimes discomfort and it is on those days when tired, feeling low or feeling not progressing or disillusioned that you need this to kick in to keep you going – this your friend indeed and one many need to keep working on.

and finally

*Willingness to challenge: being ready to challenge yourself, all you know about yourself and the world you have known around you all your life. To create new ways of thinking and being and open yourself to new possibilities for yourself, both in your personal and business life.

So – are you ready for change challenge

This is only 7 days but you will be surprised how far you can travel in 7 days – start laying your foundation stones or blocks for changing to your ideal life or ideal business life – are you ready to take up the challenge!

Begin a Journal with

Day 1 – Ready to change Challenge – and begin by looking at these few questions. Write your answers in your journal – do it intuitively ie do not think about it too long – just write them and do not be afraid of what you write to either of the questions – trust yourself – never be afraid to have dreams or aspirations – but be honest with yourself – only you will see.

Who do you think you are?

Who do you NEED to think you are to have the life you want?

To start we need to know where we are and then to also know where we are wanting to go – and its the same with ourselves.

Good luck and have fun with this all over the next 7 days – thank you for taking part and I look forward hearing back from you on how your challenge is going.

Life is a Celebration

Posted on 08.10.13 | Leave a Comment

Life is a Celebration

One of the major important things that we often forget to do in our lives is celebrate.

In the quest for positivity and changing my life I have begun to make small changes by celebrating life – celebrating successes small or large – often daily. Not with big parties and big showy stuff but just by acknowledging them and saying in many cases `well done` to myself, my family, my friends and to those clients and business partners I work with. Wow what a difference it makes.

Life is a celebration – and it should be – coaching for me has made me learn how to and what to celebrate and enjoy from life – both on a personal and a professional business point of view.

Life is a celebration – and it should be – we often carry around with us Life Scripts from our past and it often these that are in many cases very negative for us – placing the seeds of doubt, telling us we are `not good enough` to deserve to be successful (in whatever format that might be its not always about financial success).

Life is a celebration – and it should be – after all what is there not to celebrate – in many cases many other people would love to have what many of us have – its about re framing our thinking, re looking at things and wondering and pondering and then finding solutions rather than finding problems.

So lets together Live Life and enjoy life and celebrate life, in all its glory – and hey without the bad things or times we can not really always then appreciate the good – no one ever said Life was a bed of roses but you can always make it better – getting into the right frame of mind is what is important. And this goes for being in business as well – having the right business mindset, thinking sometimes outside of the `box` is important and maybe even vital – so celebrate life with me and remember

Celebrate all successes no matter how small or large and Celebrate Life.