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Getting Started in the World of Coaching

Well, after today and being referenced in a colleagues blog, I felt I needed to get back to this blog thing that I have had set up on my website here at www.sljassociates.co.uk.

Confirmation That Coaching Is For Me

Today has made me realise that I might actually be working in the right direction for my skills,  knowledge and experience – not that I actually doubted that to be fair internally – i.e. the left side of me screaming at me regularly, “Yes, Yes, Yes! – coaching is for you. Not counselling, advice and guidance. Not all that other stuff – but coaching (bring in those other skills you have) but its coaching for you lady.”

But I also have a right side of me going… “Mmmmm, are you sure now?” (Can you even hear the slower voice and pondering, thumb and fore finger rubbing chin and asking with nodding head – are you sure this is for you – are you sure anyone would want YOU to coach them?)

And sometimes, this little act of internal discussion can stop any of us from proceeding down the road of what we would truly like to do – and although mine has not stopped me – this internal dialogue has certainly slowed me down in taking part in the big `putting myself out there scenario`s and debates.

I am not even going to begin in this blog to look at what my own lifescripts were or where my self limiting beliefs came from, or any of that – thats another discussion and a blog discussing how they can prevent and block so many of us for reaching our true or possible potentials. So, it’s not for today.

My Coaching Journey

Today for me is about why or how or what brought me into this area of work and into the direction of Coaching.  Prior to 18 months ago or even 12 months ago – say anything to me about `coaching` and I might have sort of flickered in my head sports coaching, management coaching.  Maybe I thought a little about it being mentoring and the like.  But business coaching, performance coaching, personal development and life coaching or any of the areas in this world and I might have asked, “Mmmmm, not sure explain that to me a bit more.”

Yet, little had I realised I have been operating in this arena for over a decade and did not even realise it.

My journey… I could pretend started back when working in the Corporate World or in the Public Sector that have been enslaved to for 20+ years.  I played about on the fringes of it all – got qualified in all sorts of areas and used those skills to broaden my experiences and widen my understanding of working with people – as it’s that journey that has been the greatest one.  It does not matter what company, what business, what part of the world, what part of the country, or what community – it is all about working with people – and that I have done all my life and always been sort of ok at…

That’s not to say I have everyone liking or loving me, but 99.9% I believe could work with me.  So that was what my life work and journey has been so far – people – I am in the business of people and people are my business.  Sounds simple. I know, I thought so too…

“So, is that it?” I hear you ask – no it’s the “so what?” question.  So what you work with people? And…

Well the AND was around 12 months ago.  Starting to believe again in myself, in my skills, in my potential to be successful, to be positive in mind, body and spirit, in letting go of past, in being an instrument for myself to be successful – to be able to do anything I want, to be the person I have always wanted (and knew) I could be.  That journey began by reading a book that I have read before, talked about with friends and colleagues I’ve worked with for many years (as I said before, I  walked on the edges of this path for so long)

The book that got me thinking

The book that started my coaching journey

Rhonda Byrne The Secret

Now I know many of you will go, “And..? It’s been around for a while now and its been talked about and raved about and yeah, yeah, yeah so what?”

Well let me just say – this was no ephiphany moment – no loud choirs singing and rumbles of thunder and a new awakening.  This was a gentle meander into literally just opening my eyes to really start to `see` and `hear` the world around me. REALLY SEE IT AND REALLY HEAR IT.

For once I was looking at a future where I could see my own business growing, see myself growing and doing things that I wanted to do in a job and a destiny I wanted to create and develop.

How did this come about?

I created it.

After having a heart attack at 44 years of age – seeing my kids and husband panic stricken and scared as it came straight out of the blue, no warning, no indication anything wrong – nothing.   I decided to attempt to stop and evaluate what was going on.

I failed at that miserably believe me – but I decided to take voluntary redundancy from a corporate public sector job been doing for 20 years in the March as I was having my heart operation in the April 2011.  Not that I gave my husband much of a choice – I was undefeatable, I was in charge.  Of course he would agree it was the best thing to do.

I had the operation and did not look for work until the September as it gave me summer off with kids so all was good… Well, not really as nothing had changed – other than I was just not working.

So September came and I began process of looking for work and came into contact with Job Seekers Plus and the fabulous world of signing on.  Apparently I was entitled to 6 months – what a nightmare.

I walked into the lions den and got eaten alive…

Not because I was naive or anything but because I had become so removed I did not think anyone would not, or could not see why they would not want to employ me.   I had a CV full of qualifications and experience and skills – and remember would pay me the sort of money I’d previously been on.

Quickly I realised this might not be the best path – maybe I might want to look at my own world of business and running a company for myself – I dallied off this path a little and got a total kicking. Metaphorically speaking of course.

So, by March 2012 my self confidence and self esteem was at an all time low and an all time zero existence.  My marriage was suffering, my health again was suffering due to being so `angry` all the time and unhappy – just full stop unhappy.

Then came me walking out of a `job` after less than 24 hours.  I’d never done anything like it – EVER.  That night, the relief was tangible but it started me thinking – why, what, how, where, when – and I sat in my sun lounge and picked up a book had been lying there for a while (see playing on the edge) and began reading this little funny little book called The Secret – and I could not put it down.

I was intrigued – I even went out and bought myself The Secret Daily Teachings. maybe this would help.  After all, positivity, positive affirmations and attitude are a method of working.  I’d being doing for years with young people and communities I’ve been working with for 20 years – so of course, it would be useful on me.

I then read more, researched more – Tony Robbins, Bev James… I went on a few coaching seminars, free weekends and workshops.

Now in the mean time, I had set up an internet online business in the crafting community – my own little business on Facebook and this was going really well – so knew I could do it.  I took those skills (not like I did not have any!) and used them to set up SLJ Training.

But something was just not quite right.

Then I went to the right seminar and came into contact with Helen Reuben from Purple Tree in Birkenhead and began my journey to become a qualified performance coach…

…and that was and is how I got started in the world of coaching.

Not by accident, but by finally beginning to listen to what, and who around me were saying and have been saying for a bit!  I still go back to that first little funny book and have read the rest The Power and The Magic – but I still believe that often it is the humble beginnings that are important.  This made me really start to look at who I could be, why I wanted it and always had wanted it.  But now I could use the right tools to go about getting it.

And that’s what I wanted to do in my business – I am my own instrument in unlocking my own potential in my own success – and my work in coaching is about working with people.  For them to be their own keys or key in unlocking their potential in their own success – no matter what that is.

That’s my business – I just had not been able to really see or hear that over the past few years – so now finally seeing and listening.

I finally got to realise that this is my goal and dream.  I love working with people, I love to see people transform – getting it, realising that they are able to `do it for themselves`, being resilient, not having to rely on others, solving it for themselves…

See? People are my business.

So thats my starting point.  Not the previous 20+ years.  It has just lead me up to gathering all the tools, resources and understanding of myself that I need to be able to get on and make me and my business successful and all that I am involved in successful.  I have 2 fabulous kids that I want to be able to go on in life and do and be the best that they can be – and see me as their role model for that.

I have goals for my business, in its development and where ultimately I would like to see it and me in the near and distant future.  But it’s started and progressing – and that is all that is important.  The rest is all just history.

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